Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Left out to Dry: the next installment

I promised to keep you updated with the happening and 'goings on' regarding my dress. Well, the story continues...
When I last blogged I had just dropped my dress off at a cleaners which assured me that they could help. I found out, less than 24 hours later that that was not the case.
Candace's phone rings at work around 12:30.
"Hi, Candace. This is Bryan from the dry cleaners.'
"Hi, Bryan."
"Hi. I was calling to tell you that we can't clean your dress."
"What do you mean you can't clean my dress?"
"Well, the care instructions say that it needs to be cleaned with a petroleum solvent which has actually been outlawed in America for 20 or 30 years."
"My dress is a year old."
"It obviously wasn't made in America. Is it really that important for you to preserve your dress?"
"I am not preserving it. I haven't even worn it yet. My wedding isn't until the end of April."
"Oh. I don't know what to tell you."
"So, Bryan, hypothetically speaking, what happens if we send it through the cleaners with the current solvent?"
"Um, discoloration, chemical burns, shrinking. I wouldn't risk it."
"Great. I will be in this afternoon to pick it up."
After work I drove to the Dry Cleaner's. When I walked in, I was greeted by another sixteen year old, wired from ear to ear with braces, and thoroughly eager to help me. Maybe it was her first day. I handed her my ticket and she began going through the men's shirt. "It's a big wedding dress," I called to her, thinking that it might be helpful. The girl walked the length of the entire store two times and she finally came back to the counter with my dress in hand.
"That will be $105.47."
"No, " I said.
"No. This hasn't been cleaned."
She looked confused. "Yes it has."
"No, it hasn't. The owner called me at work today to let me know that it couldn't be cleaned here."
"But the total is on it. If the total is on it that means it has been cleaned."
"Sweetheart, believe me. It hasn't been cleaned. Now, I am going to take my dress and I'm going to leave now."
"Ok, well, I am going to have to make a note about this and tell my supervisor!"
"You do that. Good day."
I had already called my friend Juli to ask her advice. Juli (who is a God send and a fantastic woman) located a cleaner in Ogden that could help me. Elated, I left early the next morning and made the hour drive to Ogden. I pulled into the Dry Cleaner's parking lot, pulled out my dress, and prayed that the fourth time will be a charm (since the third obviously was not).
I walked in and was greeted by a very nice older man. "Hi! I am hoping you can help me. I have had one heck of a time finding a place that can clean this wedding dress. I was told that it needs a type of solvent that has been outlawed or something."
"Interesting. What kind of solvent?"
"Petroleum based?"
The man thought a minute. "That is the only solvent we use. It certainly isn't 'outlawed'. Whoever you talked to was an idiot."

So, my dress is now in Ogden. The adventures continue. I am supposed to pick it up on April 11...we'll see what happens next. Stay tuned...


Meg said...

HOly Crap. I am SO sorry that you have had to go through all of that hassle just to clean the dress. That is absolutly ridiculous! I will cross my fingers for you!

Mandee Shaffer said...

Oh man. I hope this one works out. This is ridiculous.

Anonymous said...

You realize, of course, that if you'd quit pooping on your dress you really wouldn't need to clean it. I'm just saying, this hassle could've been avoided with a little forethought. You always have the greatest adventures. Imagine how boring your life would be if everything always worked out. But seriously, stop pooping on, in, and around your dress.


Nicole said...

Wow... How stressful! I wish you the best of luck with your gown.