Monday, December 21, 2009

Vicks on your feet.

So, with my latest cold came many possible ‘remedy’ ideas from various people. Now, I tend to be horribly skeptical about cold remedies as a cold is a virus and there is no way to ‘cure’ it. It must run its course. The possible remedies ranged from Airborne (ugh) to acupuncture. Though all of these things were quasi-tempting (colds are just the worst!) I think my favorite was the remedy of lathering the soles of my feet with Vicks Vaporub and putting socks over it. This came from my mother and was then confirmed by several of my coworkers as well as Snopes.com (http://www.snopes.com/medical/homecure/vaporub.asp).

After listening to all of the stories I decided that I would give it a try. What could it hurt anyway? So I stopped at Smith’s, purchased a large tub of Vicks and headed home. At 8:30 pm, I washed my feet thoroughly, lathered the bottoms with Vicks, put on a pair of thick socks, and climbed into bed for what I hoped would be a cough-free night.

My feet had a very pleasant tingling sensation and I did feel extra warm. It was a cozy feeling of being in a cocoon. Fifteen minutes later I had a coughing attack. I coughed four or five painful, chest-wrenching, phlegm-ful, pit of my stomach coughs. Bummer.

I wasn’t ready to give up just yet. The study quoted on snopes.com was performed on children…perhaps the effects took longer for adults. I decided that it hadn’t been long enough to work properly. Again, I snuggled back into my down comforter and comfy pillow. Not three minutes later, I sat up with another coughing fit. Ugh.

My night continued in this fashion until around 4:30 am, when I drifted into pleasant, coughless sleep.

I came to work the next day to much curiosity as to whether the Vicks really worked. Sleep deprived and awfully grumpy, I announced that Vicks on your feet didn’t work and I was not happy about it! My coworker (who is also suffering from a cold) danced back to my desk and asked if I was so pleased about the remedy! She used it and slept like a baby! Between you and me, I wanted to hit her in the face.

So here is my conclusion: Vicks on your feet works if you think it will work. As I am a skeptical creature, it would not work on me. There you have it. Give it a try. If nothing else, it makes the soles of your feet awfully smooth.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

My Super Skirt!

I finally decided to give in to the skinny jean fad. I called my sister (the ultimate in all things fashion) and asked where I could obtain the cheapest pair of skinny jeans. I had come across a few pair that were upwards of $30 but quickly decided that no one should spend that much on a fad. After a frightening experience at Forever 21, April suggested that I give Target a whirl. With her guidance, I set off for Target in search of a pair of cheap skinny jeans.

Trusty Target has never failed me yet. I walked into the juniors department (ugh) and found many styles, fabrics, and fades. I chose a few different styles and quickly made my decision. However, seeing as how I was in Target and seeing as how I am me, I could not simply walk into Target with a purpose and leave with only that item. No. Target is a place to browse and pick up other items on clearance.

While browsing the colorful racks I happened upon a skirt: The Super Skirt. It is a loose pencil skirt that is blue and white print with large black flowers. It is stretchy, it swings, and has a really thick waist band (toward which women everywhere over the size of 6 are inevitably drawn). I decided against trying it on as I had already been through that circus with the skinny jeans and didn’t want to relive it. I found my size, gathered a few long sleeve t-shirts, my skinny jeans, and checked out.

The next day, I had reason to get dressed up. What better time to debut my cute new skirt? I put on my under things and black turtle neck. I grabbed the skirt and put one leg in. As my right leg entered the skirt I felt a very odd sensation. The lining of the skirt was hugging my right leg. In great panic I looked at the size to make sure I had the correct size. Sure enough, it was a medium. I was just about to be mortified by the circumference of my thighs when I looked down and saw that the creature forming to my leg was not the lining at all. The skirt had a built in pair of spanx.

A new wave of horror struck me. Has my life come to this!?! Am I now the type of woman who has to wear a pair of spanx with my skirts? Grumbling and depressed, I hoisted my left leg into the other side of the biker shorts. I pulled the skirt on and instantly felt the itchy spandex material form me into unnatural shapes. With hesitation, I looked into the mirror. It didn’t look bad at all! I might have felt like a granny, but the skirt was just as cute as I thought it was on the hanger.

So there you have it. I own a skirt with a built in pair of spanx. It is not humiliating; I think of it as my Super Skirt!!