Sunday, December 21, 2008

The Great Choir Caper

Mission: To gain entrance to Andy's sold out choir concert.
Tactic: unknown

Andy and I discussed several possible tactics as we headed toward the concert hall. "You could sneak in with me," he suggested, "then you could climb the ladder and watch the concert from the ceiling." Tempting, though I have never been up there nor am I familiar with the hall's set up. "I think I will see if there are any tickets left unclaimed," I wussed out. We arrived at the concert hall two hours before the concert's start. I sat down to read my book and patiently waited for the box office to open.
Finally, the box office opened and I watched person after person leave in despair without ticket in hand. The rumor was true. There were no more tickets left. I gathered my courage approached the box office. "How may I help you?" asked a voice that was obviously tired of saying the same thing over and over again. "I was wondering how I would go about getting into the concert." "Umm," she stammered, "The concert is sold out." "Right, I'd heard that. I was just wondering if there was an usher I could bribe or something." "Oh," she said apparently taken back by my bluntness, "Well, the box office closes at 8 and at that time we leave the unclaimed tickets out for whoever. Now, I'm not telling you that you should take someone else's ticket, but that's what I would do if I were trying to get into the concert." I thanked her and went back to my hidden reading area to ponder my newly obtained information.
The lady had told me 8pm. Well, that obviously wouldn't work since the concert started at 7:30. I thought. I had to come up with something else. I paced the halls to the west of the concert hall seeing if there were any open doors. Then I tried the hallway to the east of the concert hall. I found the ladder that supposedly led to the ceiling and seriously thought about exploring it. I chickened out and went back to my undiscovered reading spot to regroup.
I was faced with a problem. I needed to get into a room that was guarded by six ushers. All entrances were locked save the ones that had guard dogs. However was I to get in?
I decided to wait it out. I waited until I heard applause from inside the concert hall and ventured out to see the status of the ushers.
With my back to the wall, I investigated the theater's perimeter. It seemed safe. I slowly crept toward the entrance and with a quick look around, I opened the heavy door. Stealthily I stole into the hallway. This was it. I needed only to go through one door to be in the concert hall. I reached for the door...DRAT! I was suddenly face to face with an usher. The following conversation commenced in hushed voices:
"Hello," the usher said. "Are you going in?"
"Yes," I replied. "I am going in."
"Do you have a ticket?"
I thought about that. Lie? "No," I said pointedly.
"So, you don't have a ticket?"
"Why didn't you buy one?"
"I tried. The concert was sold out. There were no more tickets left to buy."
"Right," he replied growing ever confused. "The concert IS sold out."
I smiled and did my best to look whatever look allows certain women get whatever they want. "Are you telling me there isn't a single vacant seat in there? Not one open seat?"
It must have worked. The man smiled a crooked smile and told me that there were, in fact, four vacant seats directly above us. He held the door for me as I ducked inside to claim one of the vacant seats. I was able to enjoy the entire concert and marveled and Andy's glorious voice (which, of course, I can pick out from the other 300 voices singing with him).
Mission accomplished.


Reagan and Jon said...

Look at You miss Crafty! I could totally use your skizzills! do you lease them out? ;)

Candace said...

for you, reagan, anything!

kristi :) said...

it's all about your charm. :) and the "i'm gonna hurt you if you choose not to help me" vibe you can sometimes give off. either way, you rock! :)